I sit here on this beautiful summers morning with trouble in my heart. Being a Friday I was up at 0515hrs getting ready for my weekly BNI meeting. After an amazing day launching Points of You in Yorkshire, seeing people from all different cultures and backgrounds join together to open their hearts and minds to explore the undiscovered. I awoke to a barrage of news and passionate conversations about our exit from the European Union, all ranging from the elated to the terrified. So here I am, sitting down to tell you my experience and thoughts on the past few weeks and what is in store for our amazing country.
For months I have trawled the internet researching Brexit, listening to both sides with an open heart. But before I tell you about my voting experience, let me tell you about who I am.
I am a 42 year old, proud Yorkshire and British family man who owns his own business. I have lived my life from varying perspectives. In my youth I was a confused, abused and aggressive, my late teens and early twenties were spent in the armed forces, my late twenties involved some very unsavoury characters and some behaviours, actions that I would rather forget, living rough and making money by ANY means. At the age of thirty, my life changed I got married, had children and made the decision to devote myself to having a positive impact on the world and to discover my authentic self. I am proud to say that my life now is a very different place, I am with a woman who lights up my every day, smothers the world in love and kindness and makes a difference every day. I have amazing children who are following in her footsteps, forging their way in the world with kindness and authenticity and I own a successful business that specialises in helping others to develop and grow. I am a very lucky man indeed and I am grateful to the universe every single day.
So now you know a little about me, let me give you Brexit from my point of view.
From day one I was in the vote out camp. In my eyes, the worst thing that you can do with an English person is TELL them what to do! Instead, just give them all the facts and let us do what we do best. Remain calm, take emotion out of the equation and explore the possibilities. So everyone telling us to stay in Europe or else, was like red wrag to a bull and brought out my patriotic side. Lets take back control of our country, trade on our own terms, help those in need, defend the weak and build a country for the world to aspire to. To be honest I was reminded of the speech that Hugh Grant makes as the Priminister in Love Actually:
"I fear that this has become a bad relationship. A relationship based on the President taking exactly what he wants and casually ignoring all those things that really matter to, erm... Britain. We may be a small country but we're a great one, too. The country of Shakespeare, Churchill, the Beatles, Sean Connery, Harry Potter. David Beckham's right foot. David Beckham's left foot, come to that. And a friend who bullies us is no longer a friend. And since bullies only respond to strength, from now onward, I will be prepared to be much stronger. And the President should be prepared for that."
I was out, without hesitation!
Social media was erupting from all angles, right wing extremists focusing on immigration, other focusing on the politics or the economy and many more, all TELLING everyone else they are wrong. People who I know to be beautiful and kind shouting and screaming calling the other side, stupid, thick, ignorant for disagreeing. Campaigns of hatred and fear splattered all over the media effecting the whole countries energy and attitude. I could feel it everywhere, aggression and confusion getting to even the most grounded of people. I felt sick... our country was turning in on its self.
But I remained in the 'out' camp. I knew that my decision was not based on racist views on immigration, or focused on greed and that all those who knew me understood that.
On June 23rd at 10am, I collected my voting slip and entered the booth. I picked up the pencil and just as I was about to pop my x in the out box... I stopped.
My heart kicked in... I have spent the last 12 years trying to have a positive impact on the world. To help people see the need for equality, generosity and kindness in the world, I have spent years building a business brand that encapsulates these beliefs. I asked myself one question before I made my mark... could I count on the government of this country to make the right choices? What would happen if we no longer had EU laws to govern our relationships and right wing nationalists had control?
Without any further hesitation, I put my x in the box marked IN.
It is not the EU that is causing our problems, it is our own government. If David Cameron is a EU puppet, that is because he allows himself to be. Once we have a government that is on point and has the backbone to negotiate hard for our rights, we have the opportunity to shape the EU by working together to improve it. But we do not, we are governed by a government driven by greed and it may be some time before it is any different.
This morning when I heard the news that we had voted out, I was a mixture of emotion and still am. The only thing that comforted me was the fact that it was over, the decision was made and what will be will be, but one thing is for sure. Our country can only be strong if we stand up for our beliefs with love and an open heart, if we really want positive change, it starts within. It is the responsibility of us all to create a country to be proud of. Spreading discord through our social media by sharing our fears and anger towards others only increases the energy. So before you share your worries with the world, or your hatred for others with a different perspective. Take a moment to think!
Our personal impact on the world is the only true thing that we have full control over, so why not make it a positive one? Our interaction with a single person has the potential to effect another 1000 people, imagine what a Facebook posting quoting your fear for our children and the future of our economy can do if it reaches 100 people, or if it is shared and reaches 1000!!!
It is not our government that is responsible for our children's future, it is us. Our children will not learn to behave from watching Nigel Farage, they will learn from how they see their parents behave. If you want your child to live without fear or hatred then you have to show them the way.
To finish I want to return to Love Actually:
"Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion’s starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don’t see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there – fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge – they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find that love actually is all around."
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